CardiBOffsetLindaHayles

Cardi B is engaged and you’re not. Why does it appear that nice girls always finish single? Why is Cardi B winning while you judge her, calling her a ho, slut, trash and everything else under the sun?

If you’ve been following me then you know I preach be a HIGH VALUE WOMAN and DON’T BE BASIC! Are you wondering if I’m going to tell you that Cardi B is a woman of High Value? You bet I am.

I’m not going to sit here and break down her relationship. What I WILL do is show you the BEHAVIORS that she has or does that make her high value so you can learn some thangs today. Ok?

Cardi B came on the scene as a stripper who had a no-filter Instagram account. That means she would make videos where she said raw and unfiltered things. She spoke about her digestive problems, men problems, stripper problems, called people by name when they did her wrong, calls people out on their so called compliments that are just “hate” or “shade” and generally doesn’t care what people think of that. This is how the world became aware of Cardi B and in 2015 she was a regular on the VH1 show Love and Hip Hop: New York.

You might have your super-dee-dooper Christian glasses on or your super-dee-dooper judging glasses on. I’m gonna need you to take those off. It’s ok. No one can see you. I just need you to be open to accept the truths that I’m about to tell you.

Ready? Here we go.

Cardi B grew up in South Bronx and in her teens was a member of a gang. Don’t get me started about the environment where you raise your children and how children end up without a mentor. But that’s another blog. After high school at the age of 19 she was already involved in an abusive relationship. And after being fired from a job at a super market she turned to stripping as a LEGAL way to make money to leave her circumstances. Cardi admits that becoming a stripper saved her from a lot of things and was actually a positive experience for her. She ended up going back to college and because of the high expectations that come from being a stripper (as far as looks) she turned to plastic surgery and got breast and buttocks augmentation. Stripping was making her good money so she left college again.

So, let’s break that paragraph down. Cardi B:

  • Was born into an average Caribbean family in the Bronx.
  • Was in a gang by 16.
  • Dropped out of college.
  • Was fired from her job.
  • Was in an abusive relationship by age 19.

Then the HIGH VALUE WOMAN in her began to emerge.

She decided that she loved herself and that an abusive relationship was not for her. Her choices to leave were slim to none and she knew MONEY would fix this. (When you don’t have money, you don’t have choices)

  • She started stripping.
  • She began to INVEST in herself to position herself to WIN. (Plastic surgery).
  • She TOOK ACTION. She didn’t sit there and become a victim. She knew being a victim was NOT for her. So, she INVESTED IN HERSELF.  She worked with what she had and made money from it.

Moving forward. In 2015, not only was she a regular on Love and Hip Hop: New York but she also appeared in 5 other TV shows. In 2017, she partnered up with M.A.C. cosmetics, appeared at an event for New York Fashion Week, has been sponsored by Marc Jacobs, made the cover of Fader’s magazine and the New York Times wrote a half page article on her in the Style section.  She was nominated for Best New Artist and Best Female Hip Hop Artist at the 2017 BET Awards.  When the nominees for the BET Hip Hop Awards it was discovered that she was in the lead alongside with DJ Khaled and Kendrick Lamar.  She also had the #1 song in the nation. Bodak Yellow broke the Billboards Hot 100 record when it stayed atop the list for 3 consecutive weeks while becoming the 1st person of Dominican descent to ever be on the Hot 100 since it’s launch in 1958.

She frequently makes videos on Instagram where she shows you her behind the scenes life as an artist. She has worked around the clock for 24 hours and lets her fans see her working. grinding and hustling. This year, while achieving all these accolades, she also broke off a dysfunctional relationship with a boyfriend who was doing prison time. Also, remember Cardi is only 24 years old.  At the beginning of 2017 Cardi met, Offset the rapper for hip hop group, Migos. She admits that watching Offset and his group work so hard has motivated her because she sees how awesome it is to be number 1. Last night, Cardi B was proposed to by Offset with an 8 carat diamond ring.

Alright, so let’s break this down again. Cardi B:

  • WORKED HER TAIL OFF.
  • None of this just fell on her lap because she got lucky or knew the right people.
  • Because she’s not trying to be someone she’s not, she attracted the right eyeballs for her brand and business.
  • She seized EVERY opportunity presented to her.
  • Well, I’m not saying she a gold digger…  But she ain’t messing with no broke ANYONES.
  • In many interviews she says she feels powerful because she took control of her life and made her own rules.
  • By working hard she gained attention from the media, record and fashion labels.
  • Those labels gave her a platform.
  • She exploited those platforms.
  • That exploitation brought her new opportunities.
  • As she began to grow, she had to let some people go. (aka boyfriend in prison)
  • She gained Offset’s attention. (He’s been in the game for a minute)

Now, let me tell you this… Even a blind man can see that Cardi B is an asset. I’m talking about REAL LIFE MONEY IN THE BANK ASSET. Offset is partnering his life with a woman who is DOMINATING the field out the gate in her 1st year as a solo artist! He’s smart for popping the question! She’s a GREAT INVESTMENT. YES!  I said it. She’s an INVESTMENT.

Let me share something with you that an ethics professor taught me in college… He said we all (humans) listen to the same radio station… WIIFM.  What’s In It For Me? Every relationship; business, work, friendship and romance should be one where BOTH people are getting what it is they want! End of story.

One of the reasons women are in unhappy relationships is because the man is getting what he wants but she’s not. And it’s mainly because she is scared to speak up and SAY WHAT HER REQUIREMENTS ARE because she doesn’t want to “scare him away”. This thinking comes from a lack mentality and low self worth. In this instance women think if they “scare him off” with their demands they won’t meet another man any time soon so they lower their worth and settle for a relationship where they’re going to try to change the man after they make him “the one”.

I’d love for you to take a page out of Cardi B’s book.

  • Be authentic.
  • Be yourself not who your mom or church or whoever wants you to be.
  • Be unapologetic.
  • Follow your dreams by WORKING YOUR TAIL OFF to achieve them.
  • Let go of people who are not helping you rise.
  • Create your own opportunities.
  • Then seize them ALL.
  • Position yourself to win.
  • Be an asset.
  • Be your OWN glow up.
  • Be a woman of high value.
  • Don’t be basic.

You may not like Cardi B because she became Instagram famous, because she’s “ghetto”, because she’s a “gold digger”, because “she’s a hoe because she used to be a stripper”, because she curses so much because she’s “ratchet”, etc, etc… But all of those are your judgements, your own insecurities that you haven’t dealt with.  If you can’t see yourself in Cardi B or how you can learn from her it’s because your big judgement glasses are on. I asked you to take them off at the beginning of this blog post so you can celebrate her and learn something from her.

#DontBeBasic  Have you downloaded your free e-book on 5 Behaviors That Are Making You Basic?  Click the button below!